On Forgiveness and Gratitude
There are many who have a difficult time forgiving another (especially when the ‘other’s negatively perceived actions were taken in conscious awareness) because of a feeling that in forgiving another you are condoning their behaviour. More over, it can be difficult to forgive ourselves for allowing ourselves to be party to//on the receiving end of such an experience, whether it be abuse, betrayal, manipulation or simply someone being mean resulting in us feeling hurt in any way, shape or form, (and all things in between). The reality IS that forgiving someone else or one’s self does NOT mean you condone, promote or welcome such actions.
Forgiving someone their ‘negatively skewed’ actions [in so far as we have perceived them to so be] is allowing self to be compassionate enough to see the other individual as just that, another individual with their own story, their own perceived pains and suffering, and thus allowing self to step into the fullness of our Authentic BEingness……to feel compassion, empathy, to be the light of love we are. This doesn’t mean we are saying, “ya, that was sooo cool that you were an a-hole!!!”, or “way to go, do it again!!!”, or “thanks so much for putting me through that experience.”, or even, “I’d like to maintain our relationship.”.
It is understanding first, if we were part of any said experience, our own response ability in so being……we make the choices we make to be with the individuals we are interACTing with in our lives, however primary or tertiary they may be. Thus, if we find ourselves in a situation that is continuously negatively charged, we also have the opportunity to get ourselves out of it. Secondly, it is recognizing when we have placed ourselves in such positions, the opportunity which lies therein; which is choosing to see the experience from a positive perspective, the Agape LOVE perspective, or ‘higher/soul self’ perspective which is outside of the realms of blame, judgment and personal insecurities and fears. It is coming from a perspective of acceptance, allowing for an openness to the gifts contained therein and then actually opening those gifts and making use of them in the most gracefully divine manner we are so able to.
In so doing, are we able to be grateful for their gift [however painful it may have been to experience], for the opportunity it presented in our lives for our own growth and understanding – especially for those aspects of self that are not aligned with our authenticity, our ‘higher/soul self’ of agape love.
In releasing anger, negative feelings towards another’s negative actions, in forgiving them, and finding gratitude for the experience from a ‘grander’, detached, objective perspective, are we able to then redirect our focus back to ourselves and see how we may have contributed to the situation occurring…to our participating in such an experience in the first place – our response ability therein and thus ultimately, forgive ourselves.
(ie: an adult who is being abused can not be abused if they are not in the presence of their abuser…if they remove themselves from the situation…..)
In so doing are we empowering ourselves by embracing the opportunity presented for lessons learned, growth achieved, integrated and thus fear transcended, and our light or love ascended. It IS in so DOing we are able to fulfill our collective personal legend to be the I in me we love ourselves to be…..to shine our light of love as brilliantly as are we able, to emBODY our divinity.
Of course, it is recognized that to get from feelings of hurt to feelings of forgiveness may a journey of great lengths require, depending of course on our attunement, our alignment with BEing LOVE, on our own depth and breadth of SELF LOVE. We ALL have aspects of self we are not loving, aspects of self that are bathed in fear. It is NOT a ‘negative’ or ‘bad’ thing if our journey to forgiveness is a ‘long’ one, only…….only if we choose not to take it at all.
Here is to ALL of WE embracing our Authenticity and finding ease and grace in forgiving. In fact, here is to ALL of WE never having to feel the need to forgive for ALL~ways shall we BE coming from the perspective of LOVE’s Divine Consciousness.
Namaste Sweet Earth Angels Divine, our Universal Family***